January Happy Hour

Thursday January 28th 5:30pm
at
Blue Moose
Prairie Village Location
4160 W. 71st Street
Prairie Village, Kansas 66208
(913) 722-9463

Please RSVP to me at @myspyderweb on Twitter
or
leave a comment here
or
email me at
myspyderweb@sbcglobal.net

Check back here for possible another event later that evening.

Here it is:
Celebrate with May of May's Machete
7:00 ~9:00PM
at
Pizza Bar
1320 Grand Ave
Kansas City, Mo

May says:
I entered a drawing for this and apparently won... Please join me Thursday, January 28th from 7-9pm. I get to drink free, and y'all get '2 for 1' ANYTHING! We will also receive a FREE cheese or pepperoni pizza for every 8 people who join the group! So spread the word and come get free/cheap food/drink.

Not a bad Idea!

Drafting men over 60----this is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier-


I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a..m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch.


If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.


They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way..

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.

How about recruiting Women over 50 ....in menopause! You think Men have attitudes! Ohhhhhh my God!
If nothing else, put them on border patrol.... They'll have it secured the first night!

PSA

Just too funny not to post!

This is brilliant!

I would be the 1st in line for this! Sent to me by my mother in law.

********************************************************************

There recently was an article in the St. Petersburg Fl. Times. The Business Section asked readers for ideas on: "How Would You Fix the Economy?"
I think this guy nailed it!
_____

Dear Mr. President,

Please find below my suggestion for fixing America 's economy. Instead of giving billions of dollars to companies that will squander the money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan. You can call it the "Patriotic Retirement Plan":


There are about 40 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them $1 million apiece severance for early retirement with the following stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Forty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

2) They MUST buy a new American CAR. Forty million cars ordered – Auto Industry fixed.

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage – Housing Crisis fixed.

It can't get any easier than that!!


P.S. If more money is needed, have all members in Congress pay their taxes...

Mr. President, while you're at it, make Congress retire on Social Security and Medicare. I'll bet both programs would be fixed pronto!

Craptastic!

As many of you already know we don't have kids. Two legged ones that is. Our cats ans dogs are it. We ave done many changes and improvements at our home because of them. Last year before we lost Willow February 2009 (OMD! Almost a year)we put in the "dog comfort patio" or the patio for short. Why we waited so long to do that I don't know. Probably $$$. Anyway, It's been great because it's so easy to clean. Not like the mud that was there. I use a plastic grocery bag pick up the poop put it in a lidded bucket. Once full the hubby takes it into the woods and distributes it to compost naturally. I sprinkle a bit of sand over the spot on the patio so that the dogs don't track any in the house.

Also this last year hubby built a wall in the attached garage creating a laundry room. He then installed a dog door in the laundry room to the patio. A few days after Christmas he installed a heated shop light. It keeps the room around 50-55F. I don't worry about the pipes in there any more. Well, maybe just not as much as before.

Hubby even installed 2 cameras in the laundry so that we can log in from a computer anywhere and check on the dogs in the laundry room. There are other cameras here, the outside dog pen for one.

We also created our own dog park. Trooper doesn't play well with others. We like to to give them zoomies (time in the park) when we come home after work, weather permitting. So you see that we love our animals and work to make life here good for all of us.

So today when hubby logged in at work to check on the dogs he could only see the dog door, not the other side of the room, Only one camera was working. So he needed to go home at lunch unplug them, say woowoo, plugged them back in. Hubby called me to say that my boy, Xander, was trouble today. When Xander got in he went and ate the cat food. At some point while the hubby was home Xander brought a frozen dog turd into the house and was gnawing on it. That is so gross!!! I swear to Dog I am not kissing him today! Or maybe even tomorrow. He has NEVER eaten dog poop before. Cat poop yes. I'm hoping he hasn't developed a taste for it. I must confess that it is partially my fault. It has been so cold that is has been near impossible to pick up the poop from the patio. Either it was too frozen to the patio bricks or it was too fresh. And then it snowed, and snowed. So tonight after getting home late & then watching Castle I took the snow shovel and shoveled snow & poop right over the fence into the yard. He can eye those frozen puppy pops from a cleared patio.

Avatar Makeup!

Hubby loved Avatar! This cracked him up.
Enjoy!